Taylor Swift and Kim Kardashian. Elmo and Rocco. Vin Diesel and The Rock. These are just some of the most iconic celebrity feuds of all time, but none of them have anything on Matt Damon and Jimmy Kimmel. The source of their beef? Jimmy refusing to let Matt on his show and talking shit about We Bought a Zoo at every available opportunity. But to really understand the depths of Jimmy and Matt’s “drama,” we have to go back to a time when skinny jeans and Uggs ruled the world: 2005.
Circa 2005
Jimmy casually ends a show with, “I want to apologize to Matt Damon. We ran out of time.” The joke being that Matt Damon is way too famous to ever come on his TV show. Due to lols, he starts ending pretty much every show the same way:
Jimmy told NPR, “We had a bad show....The guests were bad, and I was feeling pretty bad about myself at the end of the program. I decided to say, for the amusement of one of our producers who was standing next to me, ‘I want to apologize to Matt Damon. We ran out of time.’ And he got a kick out of it―the producer―so I just started doing it every night to amuse him. Matt Damon was just the first name that popped into my head. I was trying to think of an A-list star and somebody we absolutely would not bump if he was on the show. The legs on this bit are unbelievable to me. I mean, people laugh every time I say it. Repeating the same joke every single night, you’d think eventually people would get tired of it, but they don’t.”
January 2008
Jimmy’s then-girlfriend, comedian Sarah Silverman, breaks the fake news that she’s “fucking Matt Damon,” in song form, no less.
January 2009
Plot twist: Jimmy reveals that he’s “fucking Ben Affleck.”
March 2010
In what we can all agree is a true blow, Matt gets Jimmy kicked out of the Handsome Men Club.
February 2012
Jimmy drops a trailer for the celeb-packed Movie: The Movie, and unfortunately, Matt’s starring role as a bunch of grapes gets cut. Hate when that happens.
January 2013
Matt takes matters into his own hands and holds Jimmy captive while he takes over the show:
He also gets Jimmy’s parents to declare that they’re replacing him with Matt:
February 2014
Matt joins a bunch of other celebrities for Mean Tweets, only his mean tweets are from @jimmykimmel.
Also February 2014
Matt—along with the cast of Momentous Men—is invited on Jimmy’s show for an interview. Tragically, an alarm goes off right when Matt is asked a question.
January 2015
Jimmy reveals that Matt is responsible for DeflateGate. Shocking if true.
July 2015
Jimmy absolutely trashes Matt’s new space movie.
September 2015
Jimmy and Matt undergo couples therapy with Dr. Phil. Glad they’re finally getting professional help!
February 2016
Ben Affleck sneaks Matt Damon into Jimmy Kimmel Live:
July 2016
Due to increasing animosity, Jimmy and Matt return to therapy...to no avail.
Also July 2016
Sad news: Jimmy is once again unable to include Matt on the show, despite him being in the greenroom. :)
August 2016
Matt releases a political attack ad against Jimmy, which, fair.
September 2016
Matt crashes Jimmy’s moment at the Emmys and trolls him over losing to John Oliver.
February 2017
Matt sneaks onto Jimmy Kimmel Live dressed as Tom Brady.
Also February 2017
Jimmy defaces Matt’s seat photo at the Oscars.
Also February 2017
Speaking of the Oscars, Jimmy has Matt played off stage while he’s trying to present.
And also treats everyone to a We Bought a Zoo tribute.
October 2017
Matt, in yet another attempt to make it on Jimmy Kimmel Live, crashes Chris Hemsworth’s interview:
October 2018
Jimmy and Matt show up to a game in adorable matching friendship T-shirts:
Jerritt Clark//Getty Images
May 2019
Jimmy has Tom Brady throw a football through Matt’s window.
June 2020
Matt takes news of Jimmy’s summer break...extremely badly.
January 2023
Unfortunately, Jimmy runs out of time on his 20th anniversary show and is forced to once again bump Matt Damon. You’ll make it one day, buddy!
March 2023
Jimmy tells People re: Matt Damon skipping the Oscars, “I’m thrilled that he won’t show. I hope he never gets nominated again.” Jimmy also blamed Matt for 2017’s EnvelopeGate, saying, “I believe that his presence in some way caused the envelope mixup.”
Matt then flips Jimmy off at the premiere party for Air.
Gilbert Flores//Getty Images
And Jimmy helpfully promotes Air on Instagram!
Toward the end of the month, Jimmy interviews Matt Damon, but unfortunately, the screen just happens to have a breakdown, prompting Jimmy to say, “You know, I think you might have accidentally turned on a filter with one of your big fat fingers.”
Aaaand that brings us up to date. What a beautiful relationship!!!!
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